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I very much wanted to be her “girlfriend,” but she was in no place to offer me that.

Yet, we spent most of our time together, had lots of sex, went on both proper and casual dates, etc. I kept pressing the issue—our time together spanned about five months—“What do I call this? ” I asked her again and again.“You’re my sweetheart,” she finally said. It was both intimate and yet somehow chaste, as if we were moments away from getting a malted at the sock hop. When a man wants validation, what's the male equivalent to go about doing it? Dear Anon., I’m not sure what male or female has to do with validation specifically,... When a man wants validation, what's the male equivalent to go about doing it? Dear Anon., I’m not sure what male or female has to do with validation specifically,...

But when those unique dating situations suddenly become your present reality, you still feel like a deer caught in headlights no matter how many books about polyamory or open relationships you may have read.

I’ve been dating a guy I met online for almost six months, but he won’t delete his online dating profile.

In the meanwhile, you might still get those email alerts when a new match has arrived.

Most of the time, you ignore them because you’ve been seeing this new romantic interest pretty regularly.

As in, “He’s my, um, friend.”You might also refer to him as something more detached, like my “plus-one,” “prospect” or literally, like, “This is my date.” Some prefer the tongue-in-cheek “not-boyfriend.” You can be coy (“fancy friend”) or a bit crass (“makeout buddy”) or cheesy (“this is my luvvah”) or even snobbish/fake-French. He’s just my au courant.”) They’ll probably be too impressed to even ask what it means (well-informed or fashionable, for the record).

After all, you don’t want to jinx the relationship before it even has a chance to start.

This is not a firm rule because the terms have no strict definition.

You can only determine which term is appropriate by discussing it with the person you are seeing.

It’s a dilemma that’s more common than you think when online dating turns into an offline relationship.

The funny thing about being in a relationship when you’ve been single for so long is that you go into it having all these preconceived ideas on how you would react to certain dating situations, and you prejudge your future relationships based on your past ones.